A sample reading

A real reading on a sample dilemma, word for word as Sarathi wrote it, then followed step by step to its close. The dilemma, its one answer and how each step went are ours; every call, step and close is Sarathi’s. Yours arrives exactly like this, on your own words, and only you can see it.

Analyse my own dilemma
The sample dilemmaMy father built a small printing business over thirty years, and he has always said it would be mine. He is 64 and tired. Last month a company in Pune offered me a product role at twice what the business pays me, starting in January. My younger sister works in the business too and says she could run it, but my father does not take her seriously. If I go, I may be handing him a worry he did not ask for; if I stay, I may be living his plan instead of mine. Do I take the Pune job?
SarathiOne thing first.

One question first

Has your father seen the Pune offer, and if so, what did he say?

You said: He does not know about the offer yet, and I have not asked him what he would want if it were not about me.

SarathiThat's enough to decide on. Here is the call.
Higher Path

The Right Action

Before deciding on Pune, tell your father, who built this small printing business over thirty years, about the offer.

First step

You: Choose a quiet time this week and tell your father about the Pune offer in person.

The exact first sentence to say“Papa, I have been offered a job in Pune, and before I decide anything I want to hear what you would want for the business.”

On your own reading, an I’ll do this. Hold me to it. button sits here. Tap it and the step stays open until you mark it done, at your pace.

Why this option

You told us your father does not yet know about the offer, and you have not asked what he would want if it were not about you. Choosing now means guessing his worry and leaving your sister's offer untested, while one conversation turns both guesses into facts.

The question behind it: “Is the promise of the business a duty you agreed to, or a plan you inherited without ever being asked?”

Based on what you wrote

Your father built the printing business over thirty years and always said it would be yours, but now a Pune job at twice the pay is pulling you away, and your sister says she could run it.

Sarathi3 options. I lean to Tell father first, then decide.

The options

Sarathi leans here

Tell father first, then decide

He does not know about the offer, and you have not asked his wishes. Speaking first replaces assumed worry with what he actually says, and opens room to raise your sister.

If you do this: You learn whether his attachment is to the business continuing or to you running it. He may be hurt or surprised; you decide on facts, with January still ahead.

Cost: An uncomfortable conversation, possible disappointment voiced aloud, some days of waiting.

Reversible
First step

You: Choose a quiet time this week and tell your father about the Pune offer in person.

The exact first sentence“Papa, I have been offered a job in Pune, and before I decide anything I want to hear what you would want for the business.”

Back your sister, take Pune

Your sister works in the business and says she could run it. Taking Pune while openly supporting her tests whether the plan was ever about you, or about not trusting her.

If you do this: Your sister may get a real chance; your father may resist or have to rethink. You start a role you chose, at twice the pay, with family tension possible for a while.

Cost: Your father's possible hurt, friction over your sister's standing, distance from the business.

Costly to undo
First step

You: Talk privately with your sister about what running the business would mean to her.

The exact first sentence“If I took the Pune job, would you truly want to run the business, and how can I help Papa see it?”

Decline Pune and stay

Your father is 64 and tired, and the business is thirty years of his work. Staying keeps it steady and avoids handing him a worry he did not ask for.

If you do this: The business keeps its expected successor; your father is spared the news. You keep the current pay, and the question of whose plan you are living may stay with you.

Cost: Half the pay on offer, a role you were drawn to, and possibly your own plan.

Costly to undo
First step

You: Write down what you would want to change in the business if you stayed, before replying to Pune.

The exact first sentence“Thank you for the offer; after careful thought I have decided to stay with my family's business.”

Why

Where this stands

Your father built a small printing business over thirty years and always said it would be yours; he is 64 and tired. A Pune company has offered you a product role at twice your pay from January, and your sister, who works in the business, says she could run it though your father does not take her seriously. Going may hand him a worry; staying may mean living his plan instead of yours.

From the Gita

श्रेयान्स्वधर्मो विगुणः परधर्मात्स्वनुष्ठितात्। स्वधर्मे निधनं श्रेयः परधर्मो भयावहः।।3.35।।

śhreyān swa-dharmo viguṇaḥ para-dharmāt sv-anuṣhṭhitāt swa-dharme nidhanaṁ śhreyaḥ para-dharmo bhayāvahaḥ

Better one's own duty, though destitute of merit, than the duty of another, well discharged. Better death in the discharge of one's own duty; the duty of another is full of danger.

BG 3.35 — English: Annie Besant, via Wikisource (public_domain)

Word for word from the Gita.

Why this verse, for youFits directly

Your worry about "living his plan instead of mine" meets a teaching on work that truly belongs to a person versus a role carried for someone else.

Where it points

This teaching holds that work which truly fits a person matters more than a role that only looks better from outside, and it asks which role is yours. Under it, "Tell father first, then decide" lets you learn what he actually wants before choosing, so the decision rests on facts instead of a plan assumed on either side.

If nothing changes

January comes closer while your father stays unaware, your sister's offer stays untested, and the choice gets made by the calendar rather than by you.

Then, step by step, to the close

The same reading, followed to its end: each step marked done with how it went, and the next one written from that, until nothing was left to decide.

How each step went is ours, written for this sample like the dilemma. Every step and the close are Sarathi’s.

  1. Step 1 done

    You: Choose a quiet time this week and tell your father about the Pune offer in person.

    The exact first sentence to say“Papa, I have been offered a job in Pune, and before I decide anything I want to hear what you would want for the business.”

    Partly You wrote:I told my father about the offer. He went quiet, then said the business was always meant to be mine. My sister says she wants to run it, but he would not talk about her.

Pro

Every step after the first is part of Pro: each one written from how the last one went, until the dilemma is closed.

  1. Step 2 done

    You: Sit down with your father and your sister together, and ask him to hear her plan for running the business before you decide on Pune.

    The exact first sentence to say“Papa, before I decide about Pune, I want you to hear what my sister would do with the business.”

    Went as planned You wrote:My sister and I asked him together to let her run the two big clients on her own for a month, and he agreed, a little unwillingly.
  2. Step 3 done

    You: Sit with your sister and agree that you will step fully back from the two big clients, so your father sees her run them on her own.

    The exact first sentence to say“I'll stay out of the two big clients completely, so Papa sees you handle them on your own; tell me only if you want my help.”

    Went as planned You wrote:After the month he said she handles the clients better than he expected, and he asked her to take on the accounts too.
  3. Step 4 done

    You: Sit with your father and your sister together and tell them where you stand on the Pune offer, now that she has run the clients.

    The exact first sentence to say“Papa, now that you have seen her handle the clients, I want to talk with you both about what I decide on Pune.”

    Went as planned You wrote:I have accepted the Pune job for January, and my sister will run the business with him. It is settled for me.
Closed

Nothing is left to decide. This one is closed.

What you decided

Tell your father about the offer first, then decide on Pune with the business question tested rather than guessed.

What you did

You told your father about the offer, then sat with him and your sister and asked him to let her run the two big clients on her own. You stepped back so he could see her work, he asked her to take on the accounts too, and then you told them both where you stand on Pune.

Where it stands, in your words

I have accepted the Pune job for January, and my sister will run the business with him. It is settled for me.

Why it is closed

You wrote that you "have accepted the Pune job" and that it is settled for you, so nothing is left to decide on this dilemma.

Sleep peacefully.

The eight lenses, as they read this
DutySvadharma +2 Telling father honors relationship without presuming obligation
TruthSatya +3 Disclosure replaces guesswork with father's actual wishes
Non-harmAhimsa +2 Opens room to raise sister's sidelining rather than ignore it
DetachmentNishkama karma +1 Asks father's wish without fixing the outcome in advance
Clean intentShaucha +2 Motive is clarity, not manipulation of father's reaction
RestraintSanyama +2 Delays decision until conversation happens, within January window
Welfare of allLokasangraha +2 Considers father, sister, and self rather than one interest alone
DiscernmentViveka +3 Separates assumed duty from an actually stated obligation
How this reading was made
  • AskedHas your father seen the Pune offer, and if so, what did he say? — you said: He does not know about the offer yet, and I have not asked him what he would want if it were not about me.
  • LensesEight lenses read the dilemma; the call rests on the ones in play.
  • The verseChosen by reference from the curated Gita corpus and attached word for word; a separate check confirmed the fit.
  • The callMade once, after the facts, with the first step.
Next steps

On your own reading

Decision Record (PDF)

The call, the first step, the options and the verse in one record you keep. Owner-only, dated, free.

Freeyours to keep

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